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Apr. 15th, 2009

Me and Owen

Alone and Confused

I know, I probably should've checked in sooner, but I haven't had a chance.

So on Thursday, I went to the address in "Elder Ryvest's" letter. There was nothing there. No people, no Elders, no Harry. Obviously, things didn't go as planned.

I haven't heard from Jonas or Lauren since, and now their journals have been deleted. I have no idea what's going on.

I did talk to Gina. She's fine. She's in hiding. So is Taylor. They're both safe. That thing about the Ceremony was a lie. If they had used Gina for the ceremony, the Elder would be dead because of her blood. Plus, Lord Carruthers wasn't next in line. Elder Ryvest is.

See? I'm not so stupid.

So I'm not sure where I'm going next, but I'm on my own for now. That's probably best for everyone right now. I'll try to check in again soon.


Apr. 8th, 2009



Here's an explanation for what I'm about to say, for those who don't know. I don't have time to recap it all.

Lauren: DON'T GO.

As much as it pains me to say it, Lucy is right. This is a trick. The letter says they used Gina for the Ceremony, but they couldn't have. Gina's blood was contaminated by the Hart Study. She would've killed the Elder.

I know what you mean when you say that you would rather die for Harry's cause than die for the Order. But you don't have to choose.

Harry didn't have Jonas. There is no way he could've rounded up all those people. And that letter couldn't be from Ryvest because he would know about Gina's blood.

This is a trick. Don't fall for it.

Apr. 6th, 2009


Victories and Defeats

So a lot has happened since I last updated.

Last Saturday, Ananda posted saying she had taken David hostage. Lucy went and picked up her and her "father" and left us the antidote for Lauren. David got it to us. Lauren's doing better, I think, but she's still recovering.

So now Ananda is with the Hymn of One again. Or at least with Lucy, which is even worse.

Also, Harry is alive. Again. I have no idea how. The last time we saw him, he was shot and Lucy was standing over him. By all rights, he should be dead.

Unless Lucy let him live. But why would she do that?

Oh, and this is kind of interesting. I'm guessing it's another one of Harry's traps. Nice try, but I'm not falling for it.


Mar. 17th, 2009


Dealing With The Devil

So...Lauren is still sick, and we still don't know what to do about it. Lucy has offered an antidote, but she obviously wants something in exchange, and I don't know what.

Jonas doesn't think we should trust her. And I know we can't- I mean, it's Lucy- but I'm not sure we have a choice. The doctors aren't getting anywhere. And The Order needs Lauren to survive just like we do.

Of course, who knows if Lucy even has this antidote? She has made a habit out of lying to me. She was there every day the Order had me, and I don't think she ever told me one little sliver of truth. When she needed me to be good, she would say, "The more you co-operate, the quicker you can leave." But when I would misbehave, she would tell me that Daniel and Jonas were already dead, and I would never see them again, even if I got out. Basically, their chances of being alive were directly proportionate to how well I behaved myself.

She knew exactly how to play me. That's her job.

I guess my point is- I know it's a bad idea, but I don't think we have any other options.


Mar. 8th, 2009

Me and Jonas

Should've known

I was stupid. There, I said it. I was stupid for believing that he had Jonas, for believing anything he ever said. I admit it. And I'm sorry for worrying all of you. I truly am.

But I'm not going to apologize for going, because I had a plan, and it worked. Lucy killed Harry. He's dead. He's gone.

And I got Jonas back.

And Lauren is alive. She's really sick right now, though. Harry injected her with something, some poison. The doctors don't know what it is, probably something some mad Order scientist cooked up that he stole.

We're trying to figure out what to do. I'll keep you updated.


Mar. 6th, 2009


(no subject)

Private voicemail- Bree to GinaCollapse )

Feb. 26th, 2009


My mother

So...I've been pretty mopey the last couple of weeks. I haven't really been doing anything, because it doesn't really seem like I can do anything. So I decided when I woke up this morning that I need a new focus.

Gina and I talked about it, and we decided to try to find our birth mother. It's something that's been on my mind ever since my father died, but I didn't really do anything about it for a long time, you know, with "dying" and being held captive by the Order and everything. But since I met Gina, I just...it feels like I have to know. There's this little part of my life out there that I don't know anything about, you know?

I wish I'd thought to look for information about this when I was at my parents' house. But, if you guys have any advice, let us know. And if I think of anything to help you guys, I'll get in touch.


Feb. 20th, 2009

Me and Owen

"every mile further there's a part of me that slips away..."

I keep thinking about Lauren. It makes me so angry. She trusted him. I trusted him. She considered him a friend.

I shouldn't have left without her. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

I don't think you're going to get Ananda back while she's with her "father." He's her security. Whatever you say, he's going to refute, and she'll believe him. You need to get rid of him, if you haven't already. Don't kill him, if you don't have to. Just get her as far away from him as you can.

Two girls I thought I saved, and they're gone again. A lot of good I am, huh? You probably shouldn't even listen to me. I'm just trying to help.

I'm gonna try to get some sleep again.


Feb. 15th, 2009


"when you try your best but you don't succeed..."

We have Ananda. And her fake father. I shot him again. But I wouldn't have done it if he hadn't been taking Ananda away. And besides, he's alive. But Ananda won't leave his side. We can't convince her that he's not her father.

Plus, someone blew up the Youth Center while we were there, and she thinks it was me. I would never do that. Do you know how many kids were in there? Innocent people.

And Lauren disappeared. I have no idea if she was even outside the building. She was the last time I saw her, but...

Oh my god. I set out to save a friend, and this whole thing just spiralled out of control.

I'm leaving. I'm not helping Ananda any. She hates me, but she's with her real father, and I think he can help her. And everyone's already in enough danger with Him being here. We're half a second away from Lucy breaking down the door and killing us all. I just...think it's better for everyone if we split up.

I'll be careful, and I hope all of you will, too.


Feb. 9th, 2009


"the plans that I had were quickly destroyed/the problem was one I couldn't avoid..."

So...good news and bad news. And more bad news.

Good news is- Taylor picked Lauren and me up from our meeting place yesterday. We're here with her and Gina now.

Bad news- Well, not really bad for us. Kind of good for us. Bad for other people reading this journal.

When we were there, we saw Lucy. She was arguing with two Shadows. They slammed her head into the side of a car and took her away. I don't know if they saw us or not, but they didn't try to grab us.

I mention this because I know there are people who will say that we have something to do with that, and we don't. You guys obviously have some internal issues to work out.

The actual Bad News- Ananda is back with her father. She doesn't want us to come get her. She's made that very clear. But she's not safe there. I know she's not. And I think that soon, it'll be too late.

Ananda, whether we see each other again or not- Thank you for everything. Be careful. And if you ever need me, for anything, I'll be here.


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